I really wonder, just how they put up with me and why? If I was a close friend, would they be able to tolerate the same attitude, or would they walk away like many others did?.

I remember as a child when I heard my father mention to close friends about his fear of losing me. The amount of times I heard those very words repeat in my head, especially in times of trouble. I still wonder why he thought that. Was the disconnection evident, long before it took its toll?

Indecisiveness, unpredictability; This dis- ease. I’ve always looked back at the years and thought ‘Did I really say that? Did I really make those decisions?’ Like the moments where I look back on clothes I bought a year ago, thinking ‘Why the hell did I buy this?’.

I do feel lighter though. I feel comfortable with saying that the good and bad times are the pieces that fill the puzzle as each year goes by. Makes me stronger, and more accepting of why I feel the way I do, why i do the things I do. I am in a much healthier place than I was 3 years ago.

Were the last few years of your life one hell of a bumpy road? Ever thought you would be where you are now, or made the choices you made up to where you currently stand?

A MEDIA CONFERENCE TO PRESENT FINAL REPORT ON ELECTION-RELATED VIOLENCE, EASTERN PROVINCIAL COUNCIL ELECTION - 2008 WILL BE HELD AT 3.30 PM TODAY (12TH INSTANT) AT LIBRARY SERVICES AUDITORIUM, INDEPENDENCE AVENUE, COLOMBO 7.

PLEASE BE KIND ENOUGH TO SEND A RESPRESENTATIVE OF YOUR MEDIA ORGANISATION.

DR.PAIKIASOTHY SARAVANAMUTTU

MR. UDAYA KALUPATHIRANA

MS. SEETHA RANJANI

“මගේ සටහන” මේ ලියන්න සූදානම් වෙන්නෙ විසි පස් වන සටහන. සුපුරුදු ඉරිදා හැන්දෑවේ වැඩේ පටන් ගත්තෙ කරදර ගොඩක් මැද්දෙ. මුලින්ම මගේ පරිගණකය වැඩ කරන්නෙ නැතිව ගියා. ඒ මදිවට බෝඩිමේ ඉවසන්න බැරි රස්නෙ. හොඳ වෙලාවට මිත්‍රයෙක් ගෙ පරිගණකය තිබුන නිසා වැඩේ කරගන යන්න පුලුවනි. ඒක හින්දා අපහසුතාවයෙන් තමයි සටහන ලියන එක කරගෙන යන්න වෙන්නෙ. ගිය සතියෙ සටහන කියවමින් දිරි ලබා දුන්න හැමෝටම මුලින්ම ස්තූතිය පල කරන්න ඕනේ. මීට පස්සෙ ප්‍රතිචාර වලට සම්බන්ධව ප්‍රතිචාර සටහනක් ඊට අදාලව තබන්න තමයි හිතාගෙන ඉන්නෙ. එහෙමනම් ඉතින් මේ සතියෙ “මගේ සටහන” මෙතැන් සිට ආරම්භ කරනවා.

“මගේ සටහන” පසුගිය සතිවල ලියවුනේ නිශ්චිත මාතෘකා ඔස්සේ නෙවෙයි සමහර වෙලාවට. ටිකක් නොසන්සුන්තාවයෙන් ලිව්ව නිසා එහෙම වුනා කියල හිතෙන්නෙ. මේ සතියෙ නැවත වතාවක් “මගේ සටහන” පරණ පාසල් යන කාලෙ සිදුවීම් කිහිපයක් හාරවුස්සන්න කල්පනා කලා. පාසල් යන කාලෙ මීට පෙර සටහන් වල කිව්වා වගේ ගෙදරින් නිදහස ලැබිල තිබුනා අවශ්‍ය තරමට. ඒක නිසා ඇති තරම් විනෝද වෙන්න අවස්ථා ලැබුනා. සමහර සිදුවීම් නම් බොහොම හාස්‍යජනකයි. සමහර සිදුවීම් “මගේ සටහන” හරහා කියන්න අමාරුයි. මොකද ඒවා ප්‍රසිද්ධියෙ කියන්න බෑ. හරියට අර පේරාදෙණියෙ ගජසිංහ පාලම හා බැඳුනු කතාව වගේ.

පාසල් කාලය කියන්නෙ කොහොමටත් ටිකක් දගගකාර කම් වල යෙදුනු කාලයක්. ගිය සතියෙ මම කිව්වනෙ වෙසක් කාලෙට යන බයිසිකල් සවාරි ගැන. එක වෙසක් දවසක රෑ බෝ වෙලා මමයි තව මිත්‍රයෙකුයි වෙසක් සිරි නරඹන්න හිතාගෙන බයිසිකලයකින් පිටත් වුනා. අපි වැඩි දුරක් යන්න කලින් අපේ ගම් පලාතෙම තරුණයො දීපු දන්සලක් තිබුනා. අපි එතනට ළඟා වෙන කොට දන්සල දීලා ඉවර වෙලා කට්ටිය මහ හයියෙන් සින්දු දාගෙන පාර මැද්දෙ නටනවා. කොහොමහරි අපි එතනට ළඟා වෙනකොටම එක නටමින් හිටපු තරුණයෙක් බයිසකලය ඉස්සරහට පැන්නා. මගේ මිත්‍රයා කොපමණ උත්සහ කලත් හැප්පෙන්නෙ නැතුව බේරගන්න බැරිවුනා. පාර මැදට පැනපු එකාට තුවාල සිදු නොවුනත් මගේ මිත්‍රයට බිම ඇද වැටීම නිසා සැලකිය යුතු ලෙස තුවාල සිදු අන්තිමේදි සවාරිය අතරමග නතර කරල බොහොම අමාරුවෙන් ආපහු ගෙවල් වලට ආවෙ දන්සැල පවත්වපු තරුණ පිරිසෙ පරම්පරා ගණනාවකට හිතින් පිං දෙමින්. ඇත්තටම තමන්ගෙ නොසැලකිලිමත් කම නිසා සෙසු අයට සිදුවන අනතුරු ගැන ලංකාවෙ ඉන්න උදවියට නම් කිසිම තැකීමක් නෑ.

ඔය මම කියපු මිත්‍රයා එක්ක බයිසකලයෙන් යද්දි තව අමතක නොවන අත්දැකීම් වලට මුහුණ දීලා තියෙනවා. මේ කියන සිද්ධි කිහිපය සිදුවන විට අපි හිටියෙ සාමාන්‍ය පෙළ පන්ති වල. ඒ කාලයේ සංගීත විෂය සඳහා අපි අමතර පන්තියකට සහභාගි වෙනවා. පන්තිය තිබුනේ නිවෙස් වලින් ටිකක් දුර බැහැර. අපි දෙන්නා යන්නෙ මිත්‍රයගෙ පා පැදියෙන්. වයලීන පිටේ එල්ලගෙන මාවත් නංවාගෙන මිත්‍රයා බයිසකලේ පදිනවා. ඔය විදිහට පුරුදු විදිහට දවසක් අපි යන්න පිටත් වුනා. සාමාන්‍යයෙන් අපෙ ප්‍රදේශයේ පාරවල් ටිකක් පටුයි. ඔන්න ඉතින් අපි එක පල්ලමක් තියෙන හරියකට ආවා. අපිට ඉස්සරහින් බස් ර්‍යයක් බොහොම වේගයෙන් යනවා. මගේ මිත්‍රයත් බස් එක පිටිපස්සෙන් ඇරල දාලා යනවා. නමුත් එක පාරටම පාරේ ප්‍රතිවිරුද්ධ දිශාවට වාහනයක් ආවා. වාහන දෙකට එක විට මාරු වෙන්න ඉඩ නැති නිසා බස් රථය එක තැන තිරිංග තද කලා. අපිට දෙලොව සිහිවුනේ එතකොට. මිත්‍රයගෙ බයිසිකලයේ බ්‍රේක් වැඩ කරන්නෙත් නෑ. බස් රථය හා අපි අතර වැඩි පරතරයක් තිබුනෙත් නෑ. මම කොච්චර බය වුනාද කියනවනම් මට හිතුනෙ ඉවරයි තමයි කියල. වාසනාවකට වගේ යන්තම් පාරෙ අයිනෙ කටු පදුරු ගොන්නකට බයිසිකලය යොමු කලා. මගෙ නම් බය වුන පාර ඇස් දෙක පියවුනා ඉබේටම වගේ. බස් එකේ හැප්පිලා හොම්බ සමතලා කරගත්තෙ නැතුව බේරුන අපි කටු පඳුරු ගාලෙන් එළියට ආවෙ අත පය හූරගෙන. හිටපු හැටියට මළා මදැයි කියල එදා නම් හිත හදා ගත්තා.

තවත් දවසක් පන්තිය අවසාන වෙලා මමයි මිත්‍රයයි ගෙදර බලා එන්න පිටත් වුනා. එදා ටිකක් වැස්ස දවසක්. මම පා පැදියෙ ඉස්සරහ වාඩිවෙලා වයලීනයත් එල්ල ගෙන ඉන්න නිසා මිත්‍රයට හරියට පාර පෙනෙන්නෙත් නැහැ. වැස්ස වැඩි වන්න කලින් ගෙදර එන්න තිබුනු උවමනාව නිසා අපි ටිකක් වේගයෙන් ආවේ. කොහොමහරි එක තැනකදි හිතා ගන්නත් කලින් මනුස්සයෙක් පාර මැදට පැන්නා. කිසි දෙයක් කරගන්න කරගන්න කලින් ඒ මනුස්සයා බයිසිකලේ හැප්පුනා. ඒ වෙලේ මෙයා හිටියෙ ටිකක් අරගෙන. ඒ කියන්නෙ බී මතින්. මේ කෙනාට තුවාලයක් සිදු නොවුනත් එයා අතේ තිබුනා බඩු මල්ල හිල් වෙලා බයිසිකලයේ වැදීම නිසා. ඒකේ තිබුන සීනි පාර්සලයක සිදුරක් හැදිලා බිමට වැටෙනවා. වැස්සට පාර තෙමිලා නිසා එකතු කරන්නත් බෑ. තමුන්ගෙ සීනී මල්ලට සිදු වුන අලහභානිය නිසා කේන්තියට පත් වෙච්ච මනුස්සයා අපිට කිව්වා “මල්ලි, පුලුවන් නම් තව ටිකක් හයියෙන් යනවා” කියල. ඒ පාර කට වහගෙන ඉන්න බැරුව මගේ මිත්‍රයා කියපි “පුලුවන් තරම් හයියෙන් තමයි ඕයි ආවෙ. මීට වඩා හයියෙන් යන්න බෑ” කියල. ඒ පාර අර මනුස්සයට අසූ හාරදාහටම තද වුනා. ඊළඟට අපේ හත් මුතූ පරම්පරාව ගැන ගුණ වර්නණාවක් අහගන්න කලින් අපි එතනින් ඉක්මනට ආවා. ඒ ආවේ බයකට එහෙමනම් නෙවෙයි.

ඒ දවස් සල අපේ අම්මා එහෙම ටිකක් බයේ ඉන්නෙ ඔය ගමන් බිමන් ගැන. මොකද මොන ජංජාලයක් කර ගනීද කියල කියල විශ්වාස නැති නිසා . කොහොම නමුත් පස්සෙ කාලෙකදි එහෙම සිදුවීම් වලට මුහුණ පෑවෙ නම් නෑ. කියන දේවල් නොතක ඉන්න එකෙත් පොඩි විනෝදයක් තියෙනවනෙ ඒ වයසෙදි. ඔහොම තමයි දේවල් සිද්ධ වුනේ ඒ කාලයේ. තවත් දවසක් බයිසිකලය පදින ගමන් මගේ මිත්‍රයා කිව්වා හැඩලය අල්ල ගන්න කියල. ඒකට සූදානම් වෙලා නොහිතපු මම අතින් සමබරතාවය ගිලිහිලා අන්තිමට පාර අයිනෙ තිබුන කාණුවක තමයි නැවතුනේ. ඒ පාරත් අත පය වල මඩ ගාගෙන බෙරුනා.

ආයෙමත් ඉතින් මේ දවස්වල ජීවිතේ දිහාවට ටිකක් හැරෙන්නයි සූදානම. තාම විශ්ව විද්‍යාලෙ පටන් ගත්ත ගමන් වගේ නිසා බරපතල විදිහටම වැඩ යෙදුනෙ නෑ තාම. ඒක නිසා දවසෙ වැඩි හරියක් මිත්‍රයො එක්ක මොකක් හරි කරමින් තමයි ඉන්නෙ. ගිය සතියෙ බැඩ්මින්ටන් ගැහුවා හිතේ හැටියට . මුලදි මම ඒක ඒ තරම් ආස ක්‍රීඩාවක් නොවුනත් පස්සෙ කාලෙකදි මට ආස හිතුන සෙල්ලමට. සාමාන්‍යයෙන් මම කැමති කණ්ඩායම් ක්‍රීඩා වලට. මොකද අනිත් ක්‍රීඩා ටිකක් කම්ැලි වගේ දැනුන නිසා. මොනව වුනත් දෙයක් කරල බලන්නෙ නැතුව හරිම නිගමනයක් දෙන්න අමාරුයි. හරියට ආදරය කරන එක වගේ තමයි. වතුරට බැහලම බලන්න ඕනේ පීනන්න.

සෙනසුරාදා රෑ කාලෙකට පස්සෙ හොඳ චිත්‍රපටියක් බලන්න ලැබුනා. ආයතනික පුහුණුව ලබල ඉවර වුනාට පස්සෙ ටික කාලයට චිත්‍රපට බැලීම මග හැරිලා තිබුනෙ. එදා බැලුවෙ සුප්‍රකට ඉන්දීය චිත්‍රපට අධ්‍යක්ෂක වරියක් වන දීපා මේතා ගේ “WATER” චිත්‍රපටය. මෙච්චර කාලයක් ඒ වගේ විශිෂ්ඨ චිත්‍රපටයක් නරඹලා නොතිබුන එක ගැන නම් පසුතැවිල්ලක් ඇති වුනා. පුරුෂාධිපත්‍යය විසින් අසරණ කරනු ලැබූ පෙරදිග සමාජයේ ඛේදවාචකයක් ගැන කතා කරන එම චිත්‍රපටය ලාංකේය සමාජයටත් අඩු හෝ වැඩි වශයෙන් අදාලයි කියල මට හිතුනා. මිනිසුන්ගේ මූලික විඳීමේ අයිතියට එරෙහිව නැගී සිටින්නට සමාජයක් වශයෙන් පෙළඹිය යුතුයි. නැත්තම් ඒක මිනිසත් කමට වුනත් කරන නිගාවක් වගෙයි.

ඊට අමතරව මේ දවස්වල වැඩිපුරම කලේ බ්ලොග් කියවන එක. සිංහල , ඉංග්‍රීසි දෙවර්ගයේම බ්ලොග් මේ දවස් වල කියෙව්වා හිතේ හැටියට. නමුත් බොහොම දුකට හේතු වන විදිහට සිංහල බ්ලොග් කරුවන් මොකද්දෝ නිහඬතාවයකට එළඹිලා තියෙනවා වගේ පෙනෙනවා. හේතුව මොකක් වුනත් සියලුම බ්ලොග් කරුවන්ගෙන් නැවත සුපුරුදු පරිදි ලියන ලෙස ඉල්ලා සිටිනවා. නැත්තම් මොකද්දො පාලු ගතියක් දැනෙනවා. මොනව වුනත් දැන් ඉස්සරට වඩා සිංහල හා ඉංග්‍රීසි බ්ලො කරුවන් අනෙත් බසින් ලියවෙන අඩවි ගැන දක්වන උනන්දුව වැඩි වෙලා. විශේෂයෙන්ම සිංහල බ්ලොග් කරුවන් තමන් කියවන බ්ලොග් ලැයිස්තුවට ඇතුලත් කරගෙන ඉන්න ගවීන් සහ අපේ මිතුරු දිලින ට ස්තූතිය පල කරන්න ඕනේ.

යන්තම් ඉතින් “මගේ සටහන” වචන සීමාවට ආවා. එහෙමනම් ඉතින් ලබන සතියේ කරදර නැතිව ලියන්න වට පිටාව සැකසේවි කියන බලාපොරොත්තුව ඇතිව සමුගන්නවා. ලබන සතියේ හමුවෙමු.

தலைப்பைக் கண்டு உஷாராகிவிட்டீர்கள் போலும். ‘முதலாவது காதலி’ என்றால் அப்போ, உதய தாரகை உங்களுக்கு இரண்டாவது மூன்றாவது என்று பல காதலிகள் உண்டா என்றல்லவா நீங்கள் கேட்கத்துடிக்கிறீர்கள். எப்படிங்க உங்களால மட்டும் இப்படியெல்லாம் வயலண்டா யோசிக்க முடியுது…? (இருக்கோட்டும்.. இருக்கோட்டும்…)

என்ன உதய தாரகை! ஒரே காதலி பேச்சாக்கிடக்குது.. என்ன விசயம் என்றுதானே கேட்கிறீங்க…? எல்லாவற்றையும் தெளிவாக உங்களுடன் பகிர்ந்து கொள்ளப் போகிறேன். இப்போது உங்களுடன்… இன்னொரு பிரபஞ்சம் என்ற தொடரின் மூலம் ‘யாரும் பார்க்காத உதய தாரகையின் வானம்’ என்ற அடிக்குறிப்போடு உங்களைச் சந்தித்த நான், அத்தொடரில் தொடர்பதிவுகளை இட முடியாமல் போனது பற்றி எனக்கும் கவலைதான். என்ன செய்ய… ஒன்றா.. இரண்டா.. பல மாதங்கள் தொடரிலமைந்த எந்தப் பதிவையும் பிரசுரிக்க முடியவில்லை. கொஞ்சம் வேலைப்பளு கூடியதால் முறையாக இன்னொரு பிரபஞ்சத்தை சமைக்க முடியவில்லை. (பார்ரா… பிரபஞ்சத்தை சமைக்கப் போறாராம்.. ரொம்ப நக்கலாப் போச்சு…)

இதோ இன்னொரு பிரபஞ்சத்தின் மூன்றாவது பதிவு விரிகின்றது. உலகில் உணர்வுகளின் பிடிப்பில் அகப்பட்டு, தன்னையே இழக்காத சந்தர்ப்பங்களைக் கொண்டிருக்கும் மனிதர்களைக் காண்பது அரிது. உணர்வுகளுக்கு அத்தனை சக்தியுண்டு. உணர்வுகளின் மிக உன்னதமானது அன்பு என்றால் நீங்கள் மறுக்கமாட்டீர்கள் என நம்புகிறேன். உணர்வுகளின் மூச்சாய் அமைந்திருப்பதுவும் அதுவே. கோபம் என்பது உணர்வு என்றால் அதை தணிக்கக்கூடிய உணர்வு அன்புதான். இப்படி எந்த உணர்வாக இருந்த போதிலும் அவற்றை அந்நிலையிலிருந்து தம் நிலையாம் அன்பே உருவாய் அமைந்த நிலைக்குக் கொண்டு வருவது அன்பு என்ற உணர்வு ஒன்றேதான். (போதும்! போதும்! அன்புக்கு மார்க்கடிங் எக்ஸகடிவ் வேலை பார்;க்கிறீங்களா உதய தாரகை?)

அன்பின் ஆரம்பத்தில் தான் அனைத்து உணர்வுகளும் அடங்குகின்றது. காதலும் அப்படித்தான். அன்பின் தீவிரம் தான் காதலாக வேண்டும். எனக்கின்னும் ஞாபகமிருக்கிறது, நான் எனது கிராமப் பாடசாலையிலிருந்து புலமைப் பரிசில் பரீட்சையில் சித்தியெய்து, தலைநகரத்தின் பிரபல பாடசாலைக்கு கல்வி கற்க வந்த காலம்! ஆஹா… அந்த நேரம் நான் வடித்த கண்ணீரை சேகரித்திருந்தால் வறட்சிக் காலங்களில் மின்சார துண்டிப்புக்களே நடத்தியிருக்கத் தேவையில்லை. சின்ன வயசில் (அது சின்ன வயசா?) உறவுகளைப் பிரிந்து வருகின்ற ஏக்கம்! வந்ததால் ஏற்பட்ட தாக்கம்!

நான் வீட்டிற்கு கடிதம் எழுத காகிதத்தை எடுத்தால் என் கண்களே முந்திக் கொண்டு காகிதத்தில் சித்திரம் வரைந்து கொள்ளும். காகிதத்தில் நானெழுதும் பேனா மையை, கண்ணீர் வர்ணச் சித்திரமாய் மாற்றியமைக்கும். பெற்றோரை, உற்றாரை பிரிந்து வந்த கவலையின் வெளிப்பாடுதான் அது! ஆனால், அந்தக் கவலை என்ற உணர்வு என்னைப் பல மாதங்கள் காதலித்தது தவிர்க்க முடியாத உணர்வுப் பகிர்வுதான். அப்போ உங்க முதலாவது காதலி கவலை என்றுதான் சொல்ல வர்ரீங்களா? என்று நீங்கள் கேட்க நினைப்பது போல் எனக்குத் தோனுகிறது. அவசரப்படப்படாது. கவலையைப் போய் எனது காதலி என்பேனா..? சொல்லுங்க.. நீங்களே சொல்லுங்க பார்க்கலாம்…

தலைநகரத்து பாடசாலையில் கற்ற நாட்களில் நான் சந்தித்த பாத்திரங்கள் எண்ணிலடங்காதவை தாம். அங்கே சந்தித்த ஒவ்வொரு பாத்திரங்களைப் பற்றியும் பொருத்தமான நேரங்களில் பொருத்தமான சம்பவங்களினூடாக உங்களிடம் பிரிதொரு பதிவில் பகிர்ந்து கொள்வேன். இந்தப் பதிவில் எனது முதலாவது காதலியைப் பற்றி நான் உங்களுடன் பகிர்ந்து கொள்ளப் போகிறேன்.

நான் கற்றது ஆண்கள் பாடசாலையில் தான். எனது சகபாடி ஒருவன் அவனது தோழியைப் பற்றி தினமும் இடைவேளை நேரத்தில் வர்ணித்துக் கொண்டேயிருப்பான். அவன் வர்ணிப்புகளின் நான் புதைந்து போவேன். அந்த வர்ணிப்புகளில் அன்பு என்ற நிலையைத் தாண்டி தயவு, கீழ்படிவு, புத்திக்கூர்மை என்ற பண்புகளெல்லாம் குறித்த பெண்ணின் வழியே தொடர்ந்து மிளிரக் காண்பேன்.

அடப்பாவி.. அந்தச் சின்ன வயசிலேயே உனக்கு காதல் கத்தரிக்காய் எல்லாம் வந்துவிட்டதா? என்றல்லவா நீங்கள் கேட்கிறீர்கள்? வேணாம் சார். அப்படியெல்லாம் சொல்லப்படாது. எல்லாம் ஒரு பீலிங்ஸ்தான். (ஆனாலும், நீங்க எடுத்த வாக்கிலேயே இப்படியொரு கேள்வி கேட்டிருக்கக்கூடாது..) சரி.. சரி.. மேட்டருக்கு வர்ரேன்…

என் நண்பனின் வர்ணிப்புகளில் அவள் பற்றிய எனது கனவுகள் வானளாவப் பரந்து விரிந்தன. நண்பனின் வர்ணிப்புகளில் என்னைத் தொலைத்தேன். அவளின் குணங்களைக் கண்டு வியந்தேன். அக்குணங்களை அவள் வெளிப்படுத்தும் தருணத்தில் நானும் அவள் முன்னால் இருக்க வேண்டுமென்று கற்பனைக் கோட்டை கட்டினேன். நண்பன் வர்ணிப்புகளில், அவளின் கருமங்களில் என்றுமே பிழை இருந்ததில்லை என்றே சொல்லுவான். உண்மையைச் சொல்லப் போனால், நான் அவளின் குணங்களில் என்னைத் தொலைத்தேன். அவள் போன்ற ஒருவளை நானும் தோழியாகப் பெற வேண்டுமென ஆர்வங் கொண்டேன். (இதெல்லாம் ரொம்ப ஓவர் உதய தாரகை!)

நாட்கள் நகர்ந்தன. தலைநகரத்திலிருந்து மீண்டும் கிராமத்திற்கு செல்ல வேண்டியதாயிற்று. ஆனாலும், என் நெஞ்சக்கூட்டின் நினைவுகளுக்குள் எல்லாம் அவள் செயல்கள்தான் நிரம்பி வழிந்தன. என் எண்ணங்கள் கூட, அவள் அதைச் செய்வாளா? இதைச் செய்வாளா? அப்படிச் செய்வாளா? இப்படிச் செய்வாளா? என்றெல்லாம் தங்களுக்குள்ளேயே பட்டிமன்றம் நடத்திக் கொண்டன. இப்படியாக எண்ணங்களையே கொள்ளை கொண்டவளாய் எனக்குள்ளேயே குடியிருந்தாள் அவள்.

கிராமத்து பாடசாலையில் நான். அது இன்னொரு இடைவேளை நேரம். கிராமத்துப் பாடசாலையிக் ஆராதனை மண்டபத்தின் அருகால் நான் நடந்து செல்லுகையில், அம்மண்டபத்தின் அருகேயுள்ள கட்டிடத்தின் கண்ணாடிக் கதவு வழியாக ஒரு அதிசயம் கண்டேன். அது என் நண்பன் வர்ணித்த அவளே என்பேன். என்னால் நம்ப முடியவில்லை. ஆனாலும், உண்மையாக அவளேதான் அக்கட்டடத்திற்குள் அடக்கமாக இருந்து கொண்டிருந்தாள். வாழ்க்கையில் நாம் எதை அடைய வேண்டுமென ஆர்வம் கொள்கிறோமோ, மனப்பூர்வமாக விரும்புகிறோமோ அது எமக்கு எப்போதாவது கிடைக்குமென்பது திண்ணமென்பதை எனக்குணர்த்திய இன்னொரு சம்பவம் இது!

என் மனவானில் சிறகடித்துப் பறந்து அவளை கண்டதிலிருந்து எனக்கு ஒரே புளகாங்கிதம் தான். நாம் எதிர்பார்க்கும் எல்லாமும் எப்போதும் எமக்குக் கிடைப்பதில்லை. ஆனால் ஒருவேளையில் நாம் எதிர்பார்த்திருந்த எதுவும் கிடைக்கப் பெறும் போது, எமக்கு ஏற்படும் சந்தோசம் இருக்கிறதே சொல்லி விளக்கி விட முடியாது! அனுபவித்துப் பார்க்க வேண்டும்! (உங்கள் நினைவுகள் உங்களின் எதிர்பார்ப்புகள் ஈடேறிய தருணங்களைச் சுற்றிக் கொண்டு ஓடுகிறதல்லவா? ஆமாம். கொஞ்சம் அந்த நினைவுகள் வாழ்ந்து பாருங்கள்… எத்துணை சுகம்… எத்துணை இனிமை…)

எனது பாடசாலையில் அவளைக் கண்ட நாளிலிருந்து எனக்கு அவளோடு தோழமை கொள்ள வேண்டுமென்ற ஆசைதான்! என்ன செய்ய… யார்தான் இதற்கு உதவப் போகிறார்கள்…?

ஆனாலும், அவள் முன்னிருந்து நான் சொல்வதை அவள் செய்யும் அழகை ரசிக்க வேண்டும். அதில் நான் வியந்து போக வேண்டும் என்ற கனவுகளெல்லாம் கட்டாயம் நிறைவேறும் என்று உறுதியாக நான் நம்பியிருந்தேன். நம்பினார் கைவிடப்படுவாரா..? இல்லையே..

அவளின் முன்னிருந்து அவளோடு நேரடியாகப் பழகும் வாய்ப்பையும் பெற்றுக் கொண்டேன். ஆனந்தமேயுருவாய் அவளருகே சென்றேன். (போதும்! போதும்..! எங்களுக்குப் பொறாமையாய் இருக்க….)

என்ன அதிசயம்! என் தலைநகரத்து பாடசாலையில் எனது நண்பன் வர்ணித்தவள் தானோ இவளென்று சந்தேகமெழுமளவில் அவள் ஒவ்வொரு அசைவும், நடவடிக்கையும் அமைந்திருந்தது. தினமும் அவளைச் சந்திக்க நான் திட்டமிட்டுக் கொண்டேன் (எல்லாம் பிளான் பண்ணித்தான் செய்வீங்களோ?). அவள் முன்னிருந்து அவள் செயல்களிலேயே வியந்து போக என்னை நான் தினமும் கண்டேன். அவளின் நடவடிக்கைகளை எப்படிச் சொல்வேன். அவளுக்கு நன்றாகப் பாடக்கூடத் தெரியும். நான் விரும்பும் பாடல்களை மட்டுமே மிகவும் இனிமையாகப் பாடுவாள். அவள் பாடல்களில் மெய்மறந்து திழைக்கலாம்.

அவள் அனைவருடனும் மிகவும் சரளமாகவும் இனிமையாகவும் பழகுவாள். ஆனால் அப்போது, அவளை ஒரு சிலரால் புரிந்து கொள்ளவும் முடியவில்லை. அவள் சர்வகலையிலும் பாண்டித்தியம் பெற்றவளோ என்றே நான் சில வேளை எண்ணுவதுண்டு. அவளுக்கு அத்துணை அறிவு.. விவேகம்…! அந்தக் காலத்தில் அவளை விட அறிவுடையவர் யாருமிருந்திருக்க முடியாதென்றே என்னால் சொல்ல முடியும் (இதெல்லாம் ரொம்ப அதிகமான பில்ட் அப்). இத்தணைக்கும் எனக்கு அப்போது வயது வெறும் பதினான்கு மட்டுந்தான். (ரொம்ப குசும்புதான் உதய தாரகை!)

அவள் என்னைக் காதலித்தாலோ இல்லையோ நான் அவளைத் தீவிரமாகவே காதலித்தேன். ஆனால், காலச் சக்கரத்தின் சுழற்சியில் நாம் எதிர்பார்க்காத விடயங்கள் கூட வாழ்க்கையோட்டத்தில் எமக்கு இடம்பெறுவது தவிர்க்க முடியாததே! அப்படித்தான் அவளையும் நான் பிரிய வேண்டிய கட்டாயம் ஏற்பட்டது!

அவளின் பெற்றோரோ உற்றாரோ அவளைக் கண்டிக்கவில்லை. அவளுடலில் ஏற்பட்ட திடீர் நோயின் காரணமாக, அவள் சிகி;ச்சை பெறுவதற்காக கிராமம் விட்டு தலைநகருக்கு செல்ல வேண்டிய கட்டாயம் அவளுக்கு ஏற்பட்டது. ஆனாலும் அவள் சிகிச்சைக்காக சென்ற இடத்தையோ, அவளுக்கு ஏற்பட்ட நோயையோ நானறியேன்! அவள் மீது நான் கொண்டிருந்த காதல் என்னை அப்படிச் செய்ய வைத்திருக்கக்கூடாது. ஆனாலும், பிறகு அவளை நான் எனது பாடசாலையில் காணவேயில்லை. விசாரித்துப் பார்த்த போது சொன்னார்கள்: அவளுக்கு என் கிராமத்திற்கு வர இஸ்டமில்லையாம் என்று. அவள் என்னை ஏமாற்றினாளா? அல்லது நான் தான் அவளால் ஏமாந்தேனா? ஏமாற்றம் என்ற உணர்வின் தோற்றம் இங்கு தேவைதானா? என்றெல்லாம் எனக்குள்ளேயே ஆயிரம் கேள்விகள். (என்ன உதய தாரகை நீங்க லவ் ப்ரேக் என்று எங்களுக்குச் சொல்லவேயில்லை…?)

இன்றும் அவள் நினைவுகளோடே நானும் இருக்கிறேன். அதனால் தான் இன்று உங்களோடு அவள் நினைவுகளை பதிவாக்கி உங்களோடு பகிர்ந்து கொள்கிறேன். ஆனாலும் அவளைப் போன்ற பலரை இதுவரை சந்தித்திருக்கிறேன். அவளை விட விவேகமுடையவர்களைக் கூட சந்திந்திருக்கிறேன். அவர்களுடன் பழகியிருக்கிறேன். ஆனாலும், நான் முதலாவதாகக் காதலித்த அவளை என்னால் மறக்க முடியவில்லை.

என்ன உதய தாரகை! அவள், அவள் என்று சொல்லிக் கொண்டேயிருக்கீங்க… உங்களின் முதலாவது காதலியின் பெயரைக் கொஞ்சம் எங்களிடம் சொல்லக்கூடாதா? என்று நீங்கள் கேட்பது போல் எனக்குத் தோனுகிறது.

நான் அவளை செல்லமாக, போ எயிட் சிக்ஸ் என்றே அழைப்பேன். பொதுவாக அவளை எல்லோரும் கம்பியூட்டர் என்றே அழைப்பர். என்னது கம்பியூட்டரா?!! அப்போ நீங்க இவ்வளவு நேரமும் அவள் என்று சொன்னது கம்பியூட்டரைப் பற்றியா? புரிஞ்சிக்கிட்டாச் சரிதான்.. உதய தாரகை எங்களைக் கவுத்துப் போட்டியப்பா…ரொம்ப நக்கலாப் போச்சு…

இப்போது ‘அவள்’ என்று இக்கட்டுரையில் வரும் இடங்களில் ‘கம்பியூட்டர்’ என்பதைப் பிரதியிட்டு வாசித்துப் பாருங்கள். கம்பியூட்டரில் நான் கொண்டிருந்த ஆர்வத்தை காதலாய் உருவகித்து, அதில் காதலியாய் கம்பியூட்டரை ஆக்கி உங்களோடு எனது அனுபவத்தைப் பகிர்ந்து கொண்டேன். கொஞ்சம் வித்தியாசமான வில்லங்கத்தனமான முயற்சிதான்!

நீங்களும் சில விடயங்களின் மீது அதிக ஆர்வம் கொண்டிருப்பீர்கள். அதுபற்றி நிறத்தோடு பகிர்ந்து கொள்ளுங்களேன். அனுபவங்களை அனுபவித்து ஆனந்தம் காண்போமா?

இன்னொரு பிரபஞ்சத்தின் இன்னொரு பதிவுடன் உங்களைச் சந்திக்கும் ஆர்வத்துடன் காத்திருக்கிறேன்.

- உதய தாரகை

Read this for more,if you want to have a laugh.Because see,the MCR vocalist,now what’s his name,Gerard Way or something.He’s talking some big shit about their music,recording and stuff,you can really have a laugh!

I know this is a sick joke.. but couldn’t help my self posting this.. as I hope I’m not the only one out there who appreciates twisted humour. Specially since the blogsphere was already educated of matter the in concern.

Though I have no personal rapport or enmity with this said politician, I do remember having met him once in Siravasty for a brief period, during his first term and felt he could turn out to be a good politician if moulded properly. Alas he went astray.

Well, this guy who entered parliament at a tender age became notorious for his political oscillation. In 1989 he promised to share his seat with two other persons but backed out. In a way, he was the first SLMC product that went against the founder and since then he has changed a few buses.

The well known presidential adviser, [I don’t think he attended any Dale Carnegie course in L.A] a real wheeler dealer, a man who seems to know the art of how to entice and what carrot to throw to troubled beauties of less virtue, has succeeded in wooing this man who would ultimately become a laughing stock if trounced heavily at the hands of SLMC.

One wonder if the allegations are true that it was the pressure exerted by a leading business group that handles snack stalls to insurance and banking - to recover the huge outstanding of profit sharing Sharia loan, that pushed him to the lap of the presidential adviser?

The pinnacle of the Government affiliated Muslim politicians today is the Chief Minister’s post of the Eastern province. Is it another Aladdin’s lamp that could do all the wonders in the world? Will milk and honey flow in the streets of the East as soon as a Muslim becomes a CM? No not at all. Frankly it is a ruse to hood wink the innocent Muslim masses under the guise of the Chief Ministerial post, and also to hide their political bankruptcy to maintain their position for the next general election where many of them are supposed to be washed out.

Which Chief Minister has achieved great heights in his province? Under the present constitution even the Prime Minister has no power. The rest are mere puppets or moppets.

Hisbullah vehemently justified his cross over from SLMC stating that by joining government forces only he could obtain a CM post for a Muslim and that too for himself. Now he and other UPFA Muslim ministers and MPs including Mrs. Ferial Ashraff also say that the President had said that the chief minister’s post of the Eastern province would be given to the group that gets the largest seats.

But as far as the public knows no such statement ever emanated from the horse’s mouth. By other Muslim ministers ministers merely attributing the promise to him but the President actually not saying it will obviously give the President a chance to act according to the situation as he hasn’t officially committed himself. If so, is this another way to deceive the people by unscrupulous politicians?

Another twist to the politcal tale is Hisbullah saying the Eastern province CM post could be shared too. Oh Allah, he talks about polygamy. Is there a provision for more than one CM?

"If I become CM, Pillayan will be Vice CM, if he becomes CM, I will be Vice CM". Who is to believe his words? What a merry-go round is this?

The way he said no to others 20 years ago, he might say the same to the TMVP goon too, or the latter can also turn against him. Anyway as the credibility of both contenders are in question voters might not put the UPFA in a predicament but relieve them by voting for the opposition.

Further, Hisbullah in his political career has spent more time outside the SLMC than within it. But some sections of the media funnily enough continue to dub him as ‘ SLMC’s strong man’.

May I ask these sections of the media in what way he is strong? He is of lean and thin figure, he does not have the physique of a wrestler.

Besides, whether Eastern Muslims deserve the CM post or not - whetehr it is essential or not, I in my article of April 25th 2007 in another paper described Karuna as ’the future Chief Minister of the Eastern province’. It was at that time as obvious as the sun rising from the East. The rulers never had any agenda for a Muslim CM. Not even a thought was given. But the priority was to end the marriage of convenience the regime is having with ex Eastern tigers by way of baptizing them in the name of democracy, come what may.

After having cleared the East of the LTTE by setting a thief to catch a thief, the statement that, ‘the TMVP has given up its arms for the sake of democracy’ find no evidence when the rebels themselves admit carrying weapons and allow no opposition in their terrain, controlling their masses dictatorially. Bullet or ballot is the saying. Here a group has a bullet in one hand and a ballot in the other. Is this the democracy envisaged for the East under TMVP? Do they expect the LTTE to invade the East like Genghis Khan used to do while the forces are holding them in the North? A French foreign Minister once said, "If I am to get done a dirty job, I give it to a gentleman who will do the job and stay quiet. If given to a dirty man, one day I will need another dirty man to get rid of him".

In 1989, after the Soviet withdrawal from Afghanistan, Pakistani prime minister late Benazir Bhutto told President Bush, by aligning the United States with the most extremist Mujahideen groups [which gave birth to Al-Quaida] , "you are creating a veritable Frankenstein", a statement proved correct. The present events in Sri Lanka indicate that a Frankenstein is being created in the East under the false impression of introducing democracy. Let us see how things turn out for Lanka.

Above all, democracy means every thing for every body where all is equal. But the SLFP is founded on the opposite direction only, basing one religion and one race as prime and bashing the rest. All are subordinates. That is their real vote bank too. [The Jews too call themselves the superior race and all others are to serve them].

Though Muslims to some extent were accommodated in a corner of the SLFP camp, Tamils were not that welcome and SLFP’s antipathy to Tamils was well known to the country too. One can not forget the roaring words of the late Agricultural Minister Kobbekaduwa in the 80s that he would throw late Thondaman to the other side of the sea. Unfortunately the Kandyan minister was not alive to see the same Thondaman keeping his party alive in throne.

This government’s democracy is reflected well in the state media that is full of propaganda news. The news is filled with self adulation, crowing about their achievements, slandering opposition politicians while no opposition news is presented. The State media belongs to the public and is run by public funds it does not belong to a party.

In an election, public properties like newspapers, radio and television which are run by people’s money, regardless to their party affiliation or no party interest, have a code of conduct that emphasizes how much government side news it should carry, how much opposition news it should carry. Are the advertisement dues of the 2005 presidential election to state organizations fully settled?

That way, democratic values find fewer places in the SLFP. The present regime supersedes all others in democratic abuse/ election fraud in every quarter. They write their own rules. Heads I bat, tails you field, and the umpire is my nominee, is their motto. Rather than playing such matches they can say we are in power, so we deserve victory, no election necessary.

The present boast that the East was to have a "Massive" development is a fantasy. To do massive things one needs a massive amount of funds. If we have funds or if we administer funds properly we need not go to Shylock’s 8% interest. Or else, Is His Highness Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum staying at the rest rooms of the Batticaloa railway station with his kitty to build another Dubai in the East?

Look at Colombo. It stinks with garbage and sinks with rain. The road from the airport to the city is very narrow, nobody follows traffic rules and it is dark in the night giving a poor first impression to visitors.

Nothing has been done for decades. The prestigious Marine drive is full of holes as if gem mining was conducted and it’s dim after sun set with insufficient lights. Where does the rate payer’s money go? When the fate of the capital is such, how can we have a "massive" development in the East?

A former SLMC MP and presently an ambassador, once told me, Madam asked me "though we do for Muslims, they go for the UNP only. Why? I said trade is the backbone of the community. UNP does not interfere with trade or in their day to day life". Have the Easterners forgotten the interference to their daily life, the Tsunami swindle and the hurdles placed on resettlement etc.? When it is so where is the room for a Muslim CM with the UPFA? The proverb is, if you run after two sheep, you catch neither.

'I am eligible' says Pillayan

	TMVP leader says the group will carry arms until their security is guaranteed

Pillayan told Sivaramakrishnan Parameswaran of BBC Tamil Service that his group will not lay down arms until such time his security is guaranteed by the authorities.

"We will have to use the weapons until we defeat terrorism," the former member of the LTTE, described by the authorities as "terrorists", said.

We will have to use the weapons until we defeat terrorism TMVP leader, Pillayan

The TMVP leader, Sivanesathurai Chandrakanthan, has secured 41,936 preferential votes ahead of the other CM hopeful MLAM Hisbullah, who has secured 35,949 preferential votes, according to media reports.

The ruling United Peoples Freedom Alliance (UPFA) General Secretary, Minister Susil Premjayanth, told media last week that the alliance agreed to offer the post to the ethnic community that secures most of the councillors.

Minister supports Hisbullah

The unofficial results indicate that more Muslim councillors were elected than Tamil councillors for the Eastern Provincial Council.

	Muslim ministers have voiced support to Mr. Hisbullah to become CM

If the government abide by the earlier pledge, Mr. Hisbullah, who crossed over to the government from the Sri Lanka Muslim Congress (SLMC) days before the nominations, should be appointed as the CM.

A Muslim government minister has also expressed his support to the regional Muslim leader.

Minister Najeeb A Majeed told journalist Swaminathan Natarajan of BBC Tamil Service in Trincomalee that Mr. Hisbulla is more experienced to hold a public office.

Traffic/road conditions on the route from Colombo to Sri Lanka’s ancient sites at Anuradhapura, Polonnaruwa, Sigiriya or Dambulla can stretch travel time to take up the whole day. Most of the congestion occurs along the A1 and A6 routes between Colombo and the transit hub of Kurunegala. This post describes a less congested alternative route via some of Sri Lanka’s under-utilised secondary roads. Hopefully it might help some one avoid wasting their holiday in traffic.

Mrs Cerno and I found that this route got us from Colombo to Dambulla in just under 3.5 hours at an unhurried pace. We managed this despite a delay caused by a frantic search for reasonably priced roasted cashews on the Ja-Ela road, stopping to ask for directions along the way, and a leisurely Nescafe break at the half way point.

First some context

The Colombo-Kurunegala road is one Sri Lanka’s mostly two lane colonial era “highways” (also called “Trunk roads”). It shares the traffic to/from Kandy (up to the turn off to Kegalle), the outer suburbs of Colombo and the commercial traffic between Colombo & the northern parts of the country. Particularly lumbering cargo trucks linking Colombo with the produce markets of the north central province. Holiday traffic adds to the clog whenever long weekends are “created” by a public holiday (Sri Lanka has quite a few). Cricket matches at Dambulla stadium is a major traffic generator.

Further complicating matters is that the A1, A6 “highway” becomes the main street of each small town it passes through. The military and politicians use this route adding a security consideration into the mix. Another obstacle to the traffic flow are checkpoints. Road repairs or an accident will slow and back up traffic even further.

The usual method to the avoid traffic on “A” class roads (also called “trunk roads”) is to leave Colombo at 3-4am. Such an early wake-up has its own problems along with the tricky aspects of night driving in Sri Lanka. It is a time when speeding truckers and inpatient express busses hit the road.

The Map

The solution is to use Sri Lanka’s “B” class secondary roads. Specifically the route described in the map below:

You have to head north out of Colombo towards the International airport to reach the turn off to this route at Ja Ela. A short drive along route A33 gets you to route B15 at Ekala which takes you through the un-congested towns of Minuwangoda, Divulapitiya and Giriulla. At Giriulla you switch route B27 that takes you via Narammala to Kurunegala. From Kurunegala, you join the A6 to Dammbulla and beyond.

There are a few draw backs to taking this road. Perhaps this could be an issue with secondary roads. Finding public toilets is a big one. Specially if your bowel control isn’t very good. Those squeamish about pubic facilities in Sri Lanka may not find any to be squeamish about. The only option to going behind a tree is trying your luck barging into a roadside shop.

Food

Food is another factor. We have yet to find the equivalent of a rest house along this route. If there are boutique hotels they are certainly well hidden. We have stopped at two cafe/snack bar places. One a “pastry corner” near Giriulla. The other a kiosk attached to a function hall outside Narammala. Both times it was for a not for a main meal. Luckily the short travel time on this road will make easier to hold on.

Roadside assistance is another big unknown. Most likely you’ll have to ask the help of friendly locals to haul your stalled chariot to the nearest “garage”. Perhaps someone who knows more on this will chip in. Ideally the best way to avoid roadside break downs is to making sure your chariot is in good working order. Otherwise postpone the trip, get it repaired or get another chariot. Something that was totally ignored on road trip in my parent’s generation.

Safety

In all the years I’ve travelled in Sri Lanka - I’ve never been mugged. I’ve yet to hear about such an experience from anyone I know. Highway robbery is something that I’ve only heard about in relation to retail.

The terrorism factor should be a natural consideration when planning travel. Sri Lankans it is integrated into any consideration of day to day life. A new added danger could be the vigilante factor. Visitors to the country would need consult associated travel warnings etc.

There is another route along the north western coast on route A3 via Wilpathu park to Anuradhapura which runs into risks from terrorist attacks. The Australian government also has a travel warning (dated 10 May 200 against taking the A3 route. The warning also mentions route B33 from Chilaw and Wariapola in Kurunegala district. I have no idea why. I suppose this eliminates the an alternate route to Anuradhapura from Kurunegala via the A10 and A28 through Wariapola. I have never been on either of these routes.

Best part about the route I have described (to end this post on a positive note):

It takes you through an alternate Sri Lanka. No checkpoints or signs of a war (this may change based on the prevailing political weather). You can actually enjoy the lush scenery scrolling past the window without worrying about threat of maniacs on the road. This route is a refreshing change from the scenery along the “usual” route - which has taken for granted by countless trips since childhood

To be continued: more posts on travels down this road

වෙලාවක් තියෙනව නම් ඔයාලත් කියවලා බලන්න.

http://www.quangduc.com/English/basic/68whatbuddhataught.html

භරිම අගෙයි.

මේ දවස් වල නම් උෂ්ණත්වය ටිකක් අඩුයි වගේ. ඒත් ගිය සතියේ දරන්න බැරි තරම් රස්නයක්